MY LIFE

(Google translated from Chinese with little manual proving. I won’t make further corrections due to lack of time. Hope it conveys the correct meaning and you still can understand most of the essay)

My life was full of hardships and troubles. I took many detours and wasted me precious time. I am deeply saddened! As I turn 60 this year and reach out to my twilight years, it is necessary to summarize the road I have traveled so far. I have struggled all my life, but in the end, I have achieved nothing. I am tired and don’t want to fight anymore. This world is not worth my struggle and effort, it’s so disgusting. There is no place for me to live in this world. The social environment and economic situation no longer allow me to have any meaningful life. In a word, life has become completely meaningless. I don’t have many days left, because since my mother passed away, my physical condition has been deteriorating (I used to pay attention to exercise to be very healthy).

The original plan for ambitious research and writing activities was basically abandoned completely. The huge autobiography I originally planned had to be canceled (I started it more than 10 years ago, wrote hundreds of pages, and then shelved it). Therefore, this short article is a brief summary of my life. In addition, for some reason, some key stories have been omitted.

This article is quite long, please read whatever you are interested in.

MOTHER

My parents told me that the day I was born happened to be the first day after the "Three Years of Natural Disaster" passed, and it happened to be the day when the rice harvest came in the summer, so my parents always told me that I was a very lucky person. Instead my brothers and sisters suffered a lot.

When I was young, I was ignorant and often had quarrels with my mother. But since I went to college, I have become very close to my mother. Although I was studying and working in the outside world, the only thing I think about is my mother. And finally, I really missed my mother and have only go back to my hometown to live with my mother.

I originally planned to accompany my mother while doing research in my hometown, and at the same time earn some money through the Internet to support my life and support my research and study. Because after many years of hard work, I could not find a research institution that can accommodate me. Moreover, I advocate freedom and do not want to be influenced by others . restrictions .

It's a pity that people's calculations are not as good as God's calculations, and my mother died due to the gossip of people in the village. They said bad things about me, but my mother was extremely noble and could not bear the slightest insult to her child. She couldn't bear it and was forced to hang herself.

According to a teacher in the village, my mother was a very elegant and humorous person. She loved to be neat and capable. She never offended others or said anything offensive. I never thought that such a noble person could be forced to death.

Three years after my mother passed away, I weaned every day. I cried so much that I was so stupid that my tears dried up and I couldn't live anymore. Three years later, I still dream about my mother from time to time.

My mother was my only relative and spiritual sustenance. Now in my 50s, I am still as close to my mother as I was when I was a child. I can live without this world, but I cannot live without my mother. I can give up everything for my mother, including my career. For my mother, I did not go overseas. For my mother, I did not go to Beijing. For my mother, I moved from Shanghai to Hangzhou. For my mother, I finally returned to my hometown in the countryside from Hangzhou. The farmers in the village thought that I could no longer survive outside, so they returned to their hometown.

For decades, when I was away from home, the only thing that haunted me was my great mother. One can imagine what losing my mother means to me. Life has lost its meaning, and I have been aging more than 10 years very quickly. I have been observing filial piety for the past five years and have accomplished nothing. There is no more laughter, no hope, and no motivation in life, because the motivation for all my struggles comes from my mother. Without a mother, what would I do in this world? Even if I have the world, what's the point of not having a mother?

I am still alive because my mother is looking at me in heaven and wants me to live a good life. I can't let her down, I want to commemorate her, write a biography for her, build a memorial hall, and so on . It's easy to die, it's all over, and to live is to suffer, but there's no other way. Gotta survive.

FATHER

My father left me in November 2006. I did not honor him well. He was also a great father, kind and gentle. When I was growing up, he has never criticized me. Unfortunately, he did not take good care of his body. He contracted lung cancer from smoking low-quality cigarettes (I guess) and passed away without treatment. My father worked hard all his life.

His death was a huge blow to me, and my life began to go downhill ...

ANCESTORS

My grandfather passed away when I first entered college. He was in his 70s. He had a leisurely life, never experienced hardship, or even worked. He hired people to take care of the family's farmland, mulberry fields, fish ponds, vegetable fields, and the breeding of chickens and ducks. In his early years, he went to Shanghai to do business. He was married four times and all three wives died young.

The Chen family has three generations, where my great-grandfather, grandfather and father were all the only sons. The family's house was nice, and it was said that it was once one of the best houses in the village. The beams are huge, and it was said that they were transported from Haining. The wooden house was now destroyed. According to people in the village, the county government moved to my home temporarily during the China-Japan War. A company commander of the New Fourth Army also took refuge in our house.

It was said that the Chen family moved from Chang'an, Shaanxi to Wuxing, Zhejiang in the late Yuan Dynasty, and was once an official family, but there was no way to verify it, and I don't want to verify these old events.

I only vaguely learned from the only old book I have at home that the Chen family was relatively prosperous at that time. During the Tongzhi period of the Qing Dynasty, they had dozens of acres of farmland, real estate, fish ponds, etc. Others borrowed thousands of silver dollars from our ancestors.

However, the Chen family is not prosperous in the local area. For more than 600 years, there are only a dozen or so families.

STUDIES

I was 15 years old, when I entered TJ University with the second best score in the college entrance examination. In my first year, I ranked first in mathematics in the Department of Mathematics and Mechanics. I have a unique love for mathematics. After only one semester, I was transferred to the German class (but I had no interest in German or foreign languages at that time, and I never expected that I would learn so many foreign languages in one go). A year later, I was reassigned to the power machinery major of the Department of Mechanical Engineering. In fact, this major is not suitable for me. It is purely engineering. If I had been majoring in mathematics and mechanics, I might have achieved some results. I am more suited to engage in theoretical research. I have always dismissed engineering projects as trivial and have no interest in them. During my undergraduate period, I had no interest in my major, but I read endlessly all the books on the shelves of the University library that interested me, including literature, history, philosophy, physics, and so on. I was often the first to enter the library and the last to leave. Therefore, I had very little time to devote to my major. I often didn’t have time to study for the exam, so my transcripts were not good-looking, which affected my future application for studies from other schools. However, I still became interested in heat pipe technology, and I also learned a lot about Wu Zhonghua ’s three-dimensional fluid flow theory.

In the last few years of my undergraduate studies, I suddenly became interested in foreign languages. I learned English, French and Esperanto in one go. In addition to my existing Russian and German, I learned five foreign languages, which opened a door for my future career, but I was completely ignorant at the time, just curious. I only studied English for half a year and passed the master's English exam. In 1990, I flew from Guangzhou to the British Embassy in Beijing to take the IELTS exam. At that time, only the British Embassy offered the IELTS exam in the country. I scored 7 points while I had no preparation at all . During this period, I translated a lot of things, including novels, articles, into German, Russian, and Esperanto. Of course, it was purely for self-appreciation and was not published. In 2007, I discovered that I couldn’t read Russian, so I spent a few months recovering Russian and reaching the level of general simple Russian reading ability. Then, because I needed to enter the international academic community therefore I determined to become a first-class scientist, thus I learned Greek and Latin. Hebrew was required for reading the Bible and possibly studying theology. Today these languages are useless except English. Decades of hard work and countless days and nights have been wasted. English has been my working language since 1990. At that time, I was able to write 10 to 20 pages of English in one go, writing directly without the help of my mother tongue. I have written hundreds of manuscripts and tens of thousands of pages in English.

My master's degree study from 1986 to 1989 was a complete failure. I didn't make anything of value. This was mainly related to the turbulent situation at that time. In addition, I didn't have much interest in engineering thermophysics. However, it can be regarded as opening up a new way of researching the problem of coal combustion pollution. At that time, my interests turned to music, playing violin, and international finance, and I planned to engage in international finance and international trade after graduation.

Between 1990 and 1992, I obtained doctorate or master's qualifications from prestigious foreign universities (including Harvard MPA Master of Public Administration, PhD in Applied Chemical Mechanics from the University of Paris - my good classmate helped me get it in France, PhD in Gas Turbine Combustion Theory from the University of Glasgow, PhD candidacy from the University of Provence in France, PhD candidacy in Mechanical Engineering from Laval University in Canada, senior class in Mechanical Engineering from ESSEN University in Germany, etc.), I gave up easily because of a failed love affair across the Taiwan Strait, which completely changed the trajectory of my life. At that time, I was still working at the Nuclear Power Plant, but I was already preparing to work in a joint venture between the Ministry of Industry and Research and Bechtel. However, I failed to make the trip because my relationship fell through.

In 2008, I was invited by Academician Guo Zengyuan of Tsinghua University to conduct research on solar thermodynamics (a branch of solar physics), but gave up because I had to take care of my mother at home.

In the same year, Nanyang Polytechnic in Singapore originally promised me to conduct research on fluid acoustics, but later changed its mind.

In 2010, I passed the doctoral examination at ZJ University and was eliminated after the interview. It only took me 2 months and quick browsing of more than 60 books to pass the professional exam. As for English, I don’t need to prepare, I can pass it at any time.

From 2020 to 2021, I planned to go to Germany, France, and Belgium to study and research, but I was unable to make the trip due to the COVID-19 epidemic and other major reasons.

ACADEMIC

After my father passed away in 2007, with the urging and encouragement of my friends, I decided to make learning my career path.

By 2013, I had been studying thermodynamics, fluid mechanics, mathematics, number theory, cryptography, etc. for 6 years. During the entire ten years from 2007 to 2017, I had been studying various aspects of thermodynamics, fluid mechanics, mathematics, IC technology, IT, and the web. I have written hundreds of notes, pamphlets, and topic reports totaling tens of thousands of pages in English.

In terms of thermodynamics, I have thoroughly categorized its hundreds of branches and explored several of them of interest (quantum thermodynamics, nanothermodynamics, mesoscopic thermodynamics, cosmic thermodynamics, cancer thermodynamics, life and biological thermodynamics, solar thermodynamics and thermal physics , Thermodynamics and thermophysics of the sun and solar radiation, solar energy systems, solar energy technology, thermodynamics of industry and applications, etc.).

Studies of solar energy was also extended to other areas, such as solar physics, solar radiation and its measurement technology, solar aerospace, mainly solar aircraft, as well as photovoltaic and solar thermal utilization, etc. 

Fluid mechanics mainly concerned about nanofluid mechanics, quantum fluid mechanics, and microstructure fluid mechanics, including also CFD.

Systematically studied various branches of mathematics, including abstract algebra, mathematical equations, complex analysis, functional analysis, probability and statistics, discrete mathematics, computational mathematics , etc. Mainly to prepare for studies of graph theory, combination and optimization. Several major graph theory problems are studied, including TSP, etc. I’ve also applied graph theory to IC design and have written an article on the application of hypergraph on FPGA. Graph theory is the main algorithm basis of IC P&R (planning & routing).

I have gradually entered the field of IC design since 2013, because after several years of exploration, I need to find a research direction that is of great significance to me and the development of the world. In view of the fact that I realize that IC technology is currently and in the foreseeable future the future technology and most likely the most important technology for mankind: whoever masters this technology, who can dominate the world. So I decided to turn to this field.

I began to focus on cutting-edge IC technology research and explored dozens of new IC technology research directions, such as spin electron/atoms, quantum IC technology, especially superconducting qubits, and quantum gates. quantum circuits, up to quantum computers.

In the end, I decided not to engage in IC research but IC design as my research direction for the rest of my life, because quantum IC technology included, it will be difficult to make breakthroughs in the next few decades, at least in my lifetime. The so-called quantum computers in the industry are mostly hype, and there are no practical quantum computers. As for quantum communications, quantum computing (quantum computing is not the same as quantum computer) are completely different things.

In the days to come, I plan to thoroughly understand IC design, write a large number of monographs in this area, design several good ICs (limited to 3 wireless communication protocols - modem, RFID and WIFI), develop an industry website (basically stopped updating due to lack of traffic).

Starting from this year, I decided to start a new writing project, which is very large and will last for the rest of my life. This is writing about IC design. In fact, it is a summary of my design activities over the past nine years, and many of the contents have been prepared. The book is called "Semiconductor IP Core – Not Just Design" and is written in English. There is a lot of content, with more than 20 parts, and each part can be written into a thick monograph. A few have been written, of which "Hardware Verification in Python" has been published. This Python is just one of more than a dozen verification languages related to design verification, which shows how complex the content of this book is. In addition, I am very interested in the "IP Core Mathematics" part. I can study this part alone for a lifetime. It is about mathematical problems in IC design. I am going to systematically list the main mathematical problems in IC design (all impossible). and discuss some of the key issues. In fact, I have studied mathematical problems in IC design before, mainly graph theory and combinatorial optimization problems. But the math of IC design goes far beyond that. Currently, I will focus on the application of mathematical theories and algorithms such as artificial intelligence and machine learning in the development of quantum computers.

I plan to publish one book every one to two months, in English. Whether and how it will be published has not yet been decided, but it is possible that I would like to attend several academic conferences, both at home and abroad, where some of the contents of the books can be introduced.

About my research over the past 10 years, it can be found in my attached writing list, none of which has been published. Some are business writing, and some are personal essays and reflections.

JOBS

When I was 20 years old, I took the train to Beijing and came to the Ministry of Machinery Industry at Sanlihe street,  Beijing, alone, carrying a travel bag with a straw mat hanging outside. I lived in a bungalow, separated by a lake from the Sanlihe River street where I worked, and I passed through this place (probably called Bali Lake) to work every day in the Ministry. Sometimes I went to China General Electric Company, and sometimes I went to China Electrical Equipment Corporation. I really can’t figure out which division I was from. I worked there for three years (1983-1986) in name, but actually I spent two years studying at the power base in Minhang, Shanghai, including one year each at the Steam Turbine Factory and the Power Generation Equipment Research Institute. Because I was good at foreign languages (I knew 5 foreign languages at the time, English, German, French, Russian, Esperanto, and later added 3 more Greek, Hebrew, Latin), I had the opportunity to attend important meetings with ministers and abbots every week (related to national power generation equipment planning for technology imports and negotiations for technology imports with Western countries). In addition to my daily work, I was also very interested in political reform. At that time, our division was no longer in the ministry, but in a company called China General Electric Company and China Electrical Equipment Corporation (now called China Electric Power Engineering Corporation). The Machinery Ministry had been already carried out drastic reforms and diverted personnel. In addition, I was interested in the development and reform movements of countries around the world, especially Japan’s experience, which China can learn from.

After graduating from graduate school, I joined well-known domestic and foreign companies from 1989 to 1999 (Guangdong Electric Power, Guangdong Nuclear Power, Siemens, GE-Alstom, Deutsche Babcock, TÜV Rheinland, etc.) and became one of the key personnel of these companies at that time.

After master graduation in 1989, I originally planned to go to Shenzhen and contacted Deng Pufang's Kanghua Company (an acquaintance at the time was the general manager of the company's Shenzhen branch) and the state-owned import and export trading company in Shenzhen. However, the situation changed drastically and Kanghua was banned. The import and export trade was sluggish, so I only came to Guangzhou and joined the Guangdong Electric Power Design Institute.

At that time, a fellow countryman was serving as a division-level leader in the Guangzhou Military Region. He introduced me to the Guangdong Electric Power Design Institute. The Institute’s party committee secretary was his classmate and a Huzhou fellow, and he took great care of me. But I couldn't bear the old-fashioned management style of the design institute and the work of clinging to the table and drawing all day long. Compared with Shanghai, Guangzhou is very rustic, small-minded, backward, old-fashioned, has a bad climate, and is prone to arthritis due to high humidity, so I don’t want to stay long.

I entered the Daya Bay Nuclear Power Plant through an introduction. The Chinese manager of the Quality Assurance Department was also from the Guangdong Electric Power Design Institute and had a good relationship with the director. I have discovered an important quality issue with the generator installation. But I was not a regular employee in Daya Bay, only a contract worker. I cannot enjoy many benefits and felt very discriminated against. Daya Bay is located in a remote Huizhou, 70 kilometers away from Shenzhen. I felt abandoned by civilization. It is doubly sad to think that I have gone from a big city to a wild fishing village. Later, when I insisted on leaving, the French manager of the quality department tried to persuade me to stay, claiming that he would change the company culture to adapt to me, but I had other plans and didn't want to stay long. The vice president of the company representing Hong Kong’s China Electric Power also met me when I left. But during the two years at the Daya Bay Nuclear Power Plant, I was at the construction site every day, and I did learn a lot of first-hand nuclear power knowledge. It also made me truly understand what quality assurance is.

But then the multinational company was completely dependent on my own efforts. Siemens, Rheinland Technik, GE -Alstom, and Babcock were all jobs I got through self-recommendation, but of course I was not satisfied in the end.

I was a pioneer at TÜV Rheinland. With the help of my classmates, I successfully acquired Shanghai Volkswagen as a customer. Later, many German companies were snatched from another of our German rivals in just one day. The person in charge of ISO certification at Volkswagen at the time later told me that it was because he admired me that he gave the certification project to us, not to our opponent, who was also a TUV in Germany, but did not belong to the Rhineland group. Working at Rhineland was the happiest time of my life. At that time, my German colleague and I had a close relationship and were happy together every day. I will never see this kind of day again.

GE -Alstom was quite dramatic. When I had already arrived in Hangzhou, and suddenly the boss of Alstom called me to Shangri-La, and then decided that I would go to Shanghai to work. I went on a business trip to the company's headquarters in Beijing, and the president of the company would come to meet me. The company secretary called me the pride of the Chinese people. The company's Shanghai MD was a Belgian and was very friendly. We still keep in touch to this day. Neither he nor his wife have simple backgrounds. At Alstom I was also responsible for its hydropower, shipbuilding and industrial sectors in East China, with a market size of 100 billion US dollars (price at the time).

I was the Purchasing Manager of Deutsche Babcock AG in Germany and I was responsible for the global purchasing business. How much did the company value me? Every time I went to a meeting, a room full of Germans stand up and greeted me. Why? Because they respected my expertise. I flew from Shanghai to Beijing for an interview with this company. There was a room full of Germans interviewing me, but I handled it with ease and didn’t have any stage fright. At that time I was a very confident, even a little arrogant person. Not afraid of anyone.

This was my last stable company, and the next step was to strike out on my own.

There was a turbulent period of work between 1992 and 1994. After leaving the nuclear power plant, I first worked at Siemens Heiman Optoelectronics in Shenzhen. At the same time, I briefly served as the vice president in charge of quality at a company called Fengda Communications, engaged in trading at a Chinese-American trading company, and worked at a real estate company from a fellow villager in the Guangzhou Military Region. Help, I don’t know what I did in a trading company of a Hong Kong compatriot living in the Guangzhou Military Region. He specialized in smuggling auto parts. I also worked for a period of time in a company called China Precision Machinery Import and Export Corporation (a branch of the Great Wall Industrial Corporation).

21 years ago (2001), I was discussing a job opportunity with a Chinese-American in Hangzhou. At that time, he wanted to offer me a monthly salary of 3,000, but I forcibly increased it to 15,000. It's a pity that this guy didn't keep his word. After he agreed upon the salary, he was never heard from again. This is a typical Chinese-American virtue. At that time, he lamented that my living conditions did not match my background. At that time, I rented an apartment with an area of about 90 m2, and it was located in the urban area. Now I rent a farmer's house thousands of miles away from the urban area, with only about 12 m2. The gap is so direct that it is unbearable.

From 2001 to 2003, I briefly worked in Hangzhou for 2 months (an IT company doing quality certification consulting in Taiwan. The other was a state-owned enterprise in the aerospace system, also engaged in IT-related work).

MY BUSINESS

Since end 1998, while still at Deutsche Babcock, I have been preparing to switch to the IT industry, and for this reason I started my IT learning path until today. When I was still at Babcock, I was preparing to establish an online procurement system, but it was not agreed by the company.

Since 2000, I have been self-employed.

In terms of IT, in 2000 in Shanghai, I won a beer industry website development project worth XXX million from Beijing. However, the project party later breached the contract, causing me to lose everything. However, my website called softhousing.com at that time was also quite famous and it was said to had rich content. I helped a Korean to build a money-making website, as well as several other websites.

I have been in Hangzhou from 2001 to 2011. Upto I was in my 30s, my business activities were relatively successful.

From 2002 to 2007, when the solar energy industry was at its peak, I received an order for photovoltaic modules worth XXX million euros. I didn’t take the order because I didn’t want to wade into too deep waters. My website solaires.com was valued at tens of millions of dollars, but it was still far away from my expectation, so I didn't take action to sell. I was a photovoltaic expert recognized by the U.S. Department of Energy's National Renewable Energy Labs (NREL) around 2007. At the same time, my website and consulting have been highly praised and recognized by the International Solar Energy Society ISES and several national solar energy associations. My customers were all major companies in the industry (Bayer, Mannesmann, BP, Saint-Gobain, Wacker, etc.), I have established good relationships with them.

Later, starting in 2007, due to various reasons, I gave up solar energy to do other things (power equipment trading, business aviation, yachting, high-end real estate, thermal technology, financial technology, IT including software cracking and reverse engineering, web crawler development, network security and privacy, website development, mobile development, database, multimedia, translation, etc.), due to various reasons, there was no progress and no income. From then on, my life entered a trough, and I was looked down upon by all my classmates, friends, and relatives until this day. Some people also deliberately added insult to injury by insulting and belittling my character, using all possible means.

I have been trading power equipment for several years from 2007 to 2015. For example, I was negotiating with Russians for a $XXX oil pipeline gas turbine project, but it fell through due to the deterioration of Russia-US relations.

Between 2007 and 2015, dozens of my own websites were developed for business aviation, yachts, high-end real estate (castles), thermal technology, etc. Unfortunately, they did not have their own domain names at that time, which may have affected the business.

It took me several years to study software cracking and reverse engineering, web crawler development, and network security and privacy from 2015 to 2020, because I also need to crack some software, search some things on the Internet, and maintain my own network security and privacy. I want to take advantage of some of the knowledge in exchange for some RMB.

Website development, database, and multimedia were the focus of my studies from 1998 to 2010. I almost mastered all these technologies and mastered them all.

In terms of translation, I only got one project in 2018 and the money has been spent long ago. Although I know 7 or 8 foreign languages and my English is almost native, I have no problem with German and French translation. Registering on domestic and foreign platforms has no effect at all. The main reason is that the price is too low and the payment terms are too harsh to do it.

In addition, in the past two years from 2020 to 2021, I spent a lot of efforts in wemedia, but achieved nothing. Instead, I was deceived by these platforms (Youtube, IXigua, Douyin, Bilibili, etc.). On the IXigua platform, my videos were very popular. Within a few minutes of being released, it reached thousands of views, but the platform quickly blocked the increase in views. I mainly published music videos. At first, it was mainly to commemorate my mother and uploaded related videos. Later, it expanded to all the best songs and music from all over the world. So after 2 years, I became familiar with the main music works. I was not interested in pop music before, listening only to classical music.

Wemedia with pictures and texts (on Zhihu, Toutiao, Penguin, Baidu Encyclopedia, etc.) also gained nothing.

After my Wemedia business failed in 2021, I wanted to make money by writing articles. I submitted articles to several major websites. After a few months, none of them were accepted.

The fintech business carried out between 2018 and 2021 has also come to nothing. I started working on financial network security issues and later expanded to other fields, including consulting and development of financial management tools. I originally wanted to develop a financial management tool, app or platform. The development environment has been set up, the app architecture has been constructed, and the basic code has been written. However, it was probably a waste of effort. Once developed, it cannot be brought to the market, and the main reason is that piracy is too popular. The app would be immediately pirated, whether it was mobile apps, PC software or online platforms. Developing software in China was a waste of time, so I had to give it up in the end.

There was also no progress about the mobile development business that was prepared between 2020 and 2022. I originally wanted to develop some apps, but I couldn't realize it and gave it up.

I has been involved in IC business since 2013. There was still some signs of the satellite Internet modem business a few years ago (2017-2020). The website had some visits and several big business negotiations were made, but they were unsuccessful. Later the website was shut down.

But now (2021-so far), no one cares about the exclusively IC design website at all. Registering on relevant platforms at home and abroad, and sometimes publishing some articles, but unfortunately, they do not bring any economic benefits (some articles have more than 10,000 visits in several months, and this professional article has such a number of visits, it can be compared with the tens of millions of traffic on Douyin).

And writing a book is unlikely to bring decent income. At most, it can earn some fame. I have no interest in fame, otherwise I would not be isolated from the world. I just want to have good knowledge and earn some money to live on.

I am currently living in Hangzhou temporarily out of necessity. Hangzhou was my Waterloo during2001-2010, that only brought me failure and humiliation. The situation has not improved now.

FORCED DEMOLITION

I have always thought that the raging forced demolitions in China have nothing to do with me. I really overestimate the moral bottom line of those people.

As the saying goes, when the house leaks, it rains overnight. When my life is not easy and I was in the bottom, it was also the time when others want to punch you hard. I was finally faced the iron fist of the local gangsters and tasted the suffering of the people at the bottom.

After my mother passed away for several years, I was still immersed in the grief of losing my mother. I could only think about my mother and had no thoughts about anything else. However, the bandits and bullies in the village and town had long been planning to take away my house. Finally, I was forced to leave the village. They harassed me all day long, urging me to demolish my old house and buy a house developed by them. I told them, "Don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you." They ignored me and imposed their will on me. I told them that I had no money and couldn't afford the house they developed, but they didn't listen. I really couldn't bear the interference, so I had to leave my hometown and come to Hangzhou. It has only been three months since I arrived in Hangzhou. In October 2020, they took advantage of my absence and forcibly demolished the only old house my mother left for me. I am now homeless and have no fixed place to live. They broke into private houses and destroyed people's houses and property. This was a capital crime in a normal society in the past, but now they are getting away with it and even make excuses in the name of the government. Years of demolition in rural areas have destroyed traditional rural architecture, customs, and culture. Today's rural areas in Huzhou are all the same, with thousands of years of culture gone, and ancestral heritage gone. Family heirlooms which I have accumulated over the years, various commemorative souvenirs with historical value that reflect my life, including the hundreds of manuscripts I have written in the past 10 years, these priceless things may be stolen and destroyed. My loss is immeasurable. I wrote to relevant departments in the province and tried to prevarication, but to no avail. Now it is said that the house has been built, and they want me to pay the money to buy it, otherwise my house will be demolished for nothing. I didn't expect that they would treat me, a weak scholar, like this. I was really speechless. What happened to me was beyond my comprehension and all human moral norms and laws.

My property was destroyed by thugs, and the house that our family had inherited from our ancestors for hundreds of years was destroyed in my hands. My livelihood has been seriously endangered. The century-old property left by my ancestors and my mother has been easily destroyed, and I am unable to recover my own property, making me an unworthy descendant and unworthy of my ancestors. Therefore, I hope that the government will handle this matter in accordance with the law, give me justice, and comfort my ancestors. I don't know how to assert my power. I can't find a reasonable place in this world. I regret that I gave up my official career and the opportunity to be a boss to pursue knowledge and truth. In the end, a small village cadre can do whatever he wants to an uncontroversial intellectual like me, and he can't handle it, because what is the world today? I know, it’s so dark, where can I find light? In this country, power can dominate the sky with one hand, and even a rural gangster can bully a senior intellectual without restraint. There is no precedent in 5,000 years. In the past thousands of years, every dynasty has retained a minimum of respect for learned people, but now even this minimum moral bottom line has been ruthlessly trampled on. How does such a country develop science and technology and how does it rise?

The corruption, embezzlement, tyranny, and lawlessness of rural grassroots cadres are so sparse and difficult to describe. The evil old society described in the textbooks when I was a child is now vividly displayed before my eyes.

I am a scholar who is not familiar with the worldly things. I am devoted to learning. I have no energy to deal with other things. I do not have much time to deal with the harassment of village cadres. In fact, my home in my hometown was secretly demolished for nearly three years, and I did not have time to deal with it. I don't know how to handle it either. I have no conflicts with them, let alone any hatred. I hope they won't go too far, don't push people too hard, and don't give me no way out. I still have a long way to go and a lot to do. Everyone leaves a way for each other, so there is less enmity and more virtue. I also need to spend as much energy as possible on research. I am currently very busy with IC design, web development and operation, monographs writing, IT technology, etc. I am so busy that I have no energy to deal with other things. My mother's death has cost me more than five years. There is really no time to waste on meaningless things. But justice must be served and wrongdoing punished.

I am not interested in dirty and sinful politics at all. I have earthly principles and do not want to get involved. I just want to discuss the matter and solve the problem of forced demolition to prevent myself from becoming a victim of this bad government.

LIFE

Like most people, my life ship has not been sailing smoothly, and there have been unexpected events. In the past few decades of my life, sufferings and difficulties have also come one after another, which are hard to guard against and difficult to withstand.

As early as in 1996, my vocal cords were severely damaged to the point where I was unable to communicate normally with others, and my career and even normal life were basically impossible. At that time, I was unable to work at GE and to start a family. My career came to a halt until about 2015. It basically returned to normal in about a year, but there are still sequelae.

The so-called "low-end population" live at the bottom of society. Imagine that a former proud man who lived at the top of society, had rich knowledge and experience, and studied the most important technology every day - IC technology - and spoke multiple languages, was actually working with an illiterate, a low-level laborer, a rag collector, and so on. How many people can tolerate such a strong contrast when mixed together? There are few precedents in human history. But this is my current situation.

No one will feel sympathetic for me, and no one will help me.

CONCLUSION

Today's earth civilization is at the lowest stage of cosmic civilization. Since the birth of human beings, they have been full of sin, killing, rape, plunder, fraud, and all sorts of evil deeds you can imagine. The human species is more hateful and inferior than other species. The organizational structure of human society is even more contrary to God's will. In any other species, there are no huge gaps in wealth, power, etc. similar to human society. Who gave the minority the wealth and power to plunder the majority? There is no similar phenomenon in other species. All in all, human beings as a species not in accordance with the will of God, because we are not as good as birds in the sky and fish in the waters that can fly freely and swim happily. Even our power to speak and think has been taken away. I would like to ask, how many people on earth can claim to be happy?

It is really a pain to live in this world.

The above is a summary of my life, some of which I have already forgotten. When my life is well settled, I will describe these experiences of these decades in great detail, but for now, I will leave it at that.

Life has come to an end here. Although I am still working hard, the results are very little, which is too disproportionate to my efforts (10,000 paid, 1 gained). What is the problem?

(The main content of this article was written in mid-2022. Some content may have changed and will not be updated)